Education, as Krishnamurti envisioned, is not a preparation for life but the process of understanding life itself. As educators, we ought to thus ponder over what education truly means. Is our intent merely to endow our students with knowledge and explicit skills? Or is it also about leading them towards being mindful of themselves, becoming aware of their doings and emotions, and how their actions affect themselves, others and the world around them?
Education beyond the academic framework
The present age is fast-paced and in a state of constant flux. The lives of children are often steered by the urge to succeed, the pressure for acceptance, the need for social validation, and by competition. In a world that is mediated by technology, children have increasing access to forms of personal interaction such as social media. What influence does the latter have on young minds? We see that a lot of children’s reactions today are driven by fear: fear of being seen as different; fear of failure; fear of not keeping up with peers; fear of not being accepted in a social circle.
The pandemic not only caused mayhem with health and academic routines, but also blurred emotional boundaries, making children and young people feel far more vulnerable. Even as education systems were trying to fit and adjust to the new normal, it was noticed that there were changes in students’ academic growth and ability to learn. Children experienced more uneasiness and disappointment; they suffered from boredom and isolation too as they were cut off from their erstwhile social circles. This demanded the attention of educators. As a result, once the pandemic abated many schools added Social Emotional Learning (SEL) as a new subject in their curriculum. This approach is markedly different from the way school education was perceived and handled decades ago. The National Educational Policy 2020 in India recognized the need to cater to the mental well-being of children along with their academic progress. Research in psychology too upheld this approach, by suggesting that students would learn more readily if they felt supported emotionally. This indicates the need to create a safe space in every school — a space where one can be more open, knowing that one will not be judged or labelled; a space that gives the child a sense of security and reassurance. This safe space narrows the gap between a child’s inner world and his or her capacity to deal with the realities and demands of the outer world.
Social Emotional Well-being as a subject
Fear, comparison and conformity, as Krishnamurti pointed out, are invisible barriers that come in the way of learning. Recognizing the potential in these factors to constrict curiosity and stifle independent thinking, we have attempted at the Rishi Valley School to incorporate multiple support systems into the learning process. The subject Social Emotional Well-Being (SEW) in our school programme, therefore, has an important role in the curriculum. In it, we prioritize observation, awareness, and inquiry as opposed to instruction and moralizing. SEW did not begin as a clearly structured programme, but rather it was given form and content by learnings that gradually developed out of our collective awareness of what children needed as they navigated their way through many stages while growing up. Based on this collective awareness, a few workshops on the theme of ‘Growing Up’ were initially conducted with students of different age groups, in which free-flowing conversations could take place as they would in a natural setting. They heightened our awareness of issues such as self-image, bodily changes, relationships with peers, and the emotional hurdles that emerge as children grow into teenagers. In recent years, this was further deepened through workshops conducted by educators, counsellors and practitioners like Lois Englebert, Dr. Suchitra Ramkumar, Gloria Burret, and Dr. Namitha Ranganathan. These engagements enabled us to initiate the SEW programme, with an emphasis on reaching the child’s inner world and empathizing with how they feel, emote and behave. Our dialogues with these experts made us realize that the SEWsessions could not be episodic. Such an area needs consistent attention. We also saw that teachers who were in regular contact with students needed to hold these sessions so that they could listen attentively to them, empathize fully and formulate a careful response.
An evolving pedagogical approach
SEWsessions are now held once a fortnight in Rishi Valley with two facilitators who work as a team with each of the age groups across the school. The content of the sessions did not have a definite direction in the beginning; we felt our way forward with the help of our students. We would sometimes begin with a warm-up activity, or an icebreaker of some sort — like a game, or with ‘circle time’, all of which helped draw out some of the issues we needed to address together.
One afternoon, during a circle time discussion, a student from a junior class seemed apprehensive and was hesitating to speak up. Finally, she gathered the courage to make a very moving statement: I did not know that I could say this out loud. We dwelt gently on that, allowing the whole class to sit with the thought and reflect as a whole on why she might have felt that way — letting them uncover the reasons themselves instead of handing them any conclusions. When we pause in this way, we notice that learning starts not with teaching, but with the student feeling safe to be heard and to ask questions. With this awareness guiding us, the pedagogical approach that we evolved included activities that helped us to discuss students’ inner lives and vulnerabilities, which led to a process of conscious reflection. The students’ articulations of their own experiences enabled teachers to attune themselves emotionally and guide the conversation appropriately. The facilitators evolved different approaches based on age group, their stage of physical and emotional development, as well as the social atmosphere in a group of students. These sessions gradually became characterized by more conversation and fewer periods of silence. Along with discussions, there was viewing of short films, games, and role-plays. Together these created a safe space that enabled our children to freely voice their concerns and describe confusions that would otherwise be difficult to share.
In the upper elementary section, we start with small yet meaningful themes: understanding change; the value of friendship; the importance of kindness; the power of words; the courage to speak out against social exclusion. There are tiny lessons in how to observe others in kinder ways. The themes widen and extend in middle school. The children explore the various transitions they go through, be it physical, emotional, a shift in identity, and more. They are helped to familiarize themselves with identifying and expressing emotions, building better relationships with others and themselves, learning to empathize with others and avoiding comparisons. They also learn to appreciate and accept differences. In senior school, we enter into an ‘adulting’ process. Students learn to develop deep personal insight by looking at themselves, understanding why they put on a ‘mask’ at times, identifying the true self, understanding why people create stereotypes and how one should respond to them, dealing with social exclusion and bullying, and becoming aware of how these affect individuals. Gender identity and sexual orientation are discussed with the intent of building an inclusive environment. Life skills — such as dealing with academic rigour, choosing courses and careers, managing daily tasks, and basic financial literacy — are some other key topics in these sessions.
What worked
I feel so much lighter after talking about it. This statement conveys a lot: that the structure of the programme did not make as much of a difference as did the climate of safety and empathy that embraces every SEWparticipant. At the start of sessions, we can see students hesitating to open up, particularly those in senior school, but over time they gradually begin to relax and feel safer. They are then able to recognize and express their emotions. A key learning for us all was that expression of emotions is welcome but not all kinds of behaviour, and that acknowledging a situation is the best way to handle suffering. We noticed that the children’s connections with their peers improved, their ability to empathize with others developed, they could examine issues more deeply, they began to understand why classmates acted a certain way and learn to accept it, and finally to identify areas in themselves that needed change. This encouraged kindness and sensitivity towards others and themselves. In the end, what is clear is that when children are seen, heard, and understood, they are better able to take charge of their own social and emotional well-being.
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The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.
—Diane Von Furstenberg, in Diane: A Signature Life
Anytime we can listen to true self and give the care it requires, we do it not only for ourselves, but for the many others whose lives we touch.
—Parker Palmer, in Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation